Anti-Aging in Wood Ridge, New Jersey

Menopause and Giving in to the Mystery

By Menopause Goddess, Lynette Sheppard

Early in my Menopause transition (euphemism for hellish maelstrom of horrifying hormonal events), so many things bothered me that I couldn't keep count. As the preliminary WTF freakouts of perimenopause and volcanic upheavals of The Big M are now mostly in my rear view mirror, I realize that some irritants that used to upset me simply don’t any longer. And that’s a real blessing.

For example, I used to be confounded and annoyed by the backhanded compliment "You look good…for your age." Now, heck, I'll take any compliment I can get without overanalyzing it for nuance or even honesty. I'll just focus on the "look good" part and thank the complimenter with sincere gratitude.

Being called ma'am initially was both disconcerting and horrifying. My mom is ma'am. And she just barely. I felt old and frumpy every time I was addressed in this fashion usually by someone only recently out of diapers, waiting on me in the store or bank.

But now, I gotta say, I'm okay with ma’am. You might say I've grown into it. Ma'am. Short for madam – now there’s a racy little thought. And when someone calls me "Miss"? I know they're just sucking up or trying to sell me something. I no way qualify for "Miss" anymore. Another thing in my rear view mirror and I don’t really miss it.

I've heard some of my friends and sister goddesses over the years complain about being invisible. And I've certainly experienced that evanescence myself when a clerk looks right past me to wait on some hot young woman. "Hey!" I'd want to yell. "I"m right here taking up space. Service me – or at least wait on me." (No I never did yell, I'd just clear my throat and say, "Excuse me, I believe I was here first." Which either worked or didn't.

However, now in my post menopausal incarnation, I find that I enjoy a certain anonymity, thanks to this decreasing visibility. I can slip in and out of places faster than a greased pig. Hawkers on the street miss giving me flyers. I love that.

And if I'm having a bad hair day? Or a fat day? Who cares? I'm invisible in the very best way and can just go about my business, carefree and happy. I don't have an image to keep up. I'm ma'am now, remember?

No, I'm not letting myself go – just letting myself be. So much easier when you aren't noticed that much anymore. Whew, what a relief. Forgetting things drove me absolutely stark staring mad in the beginning of my transition. Not so anymore. I'm used to it. I have workarounds to make my life work. I am the Queen of ritual and OCD in organizing stuff.

I just can't trust my formerly prodigious memory any longer to pick up the slack. And honestly, I can't get all worked up about it anymore. I exercise my brain as well as my body but neither are going to be in Olympic condition any time soon. Or ever. Hence the workarounds.

Lastly, not knowing the why of things sent me into an info gathering tailspin. Not all bad. I've learned (and shared) so much about the crazy Menopause journey through my incessant desire for understanding. And while I can learn and understand a lot, some things will remain incomprehensible. Maybe forever.

Like why I had hot flashes to the point of nausea and my friend Susan had nary a flush. Or why black cohosh works for some and not others. Or why I and others lose our hair while some women boast luxurious manes all their lives.

Overall, I've come to an acceptance that some things may never be clear. In a sense, I’m on a need-to-know basis – and apparently the great mystery has decided that I don’t really need to know. So be it.

Maybe the biggest change is this: I'm just going to enjoy the Mystery, however it plays out, whatever challenges or wonders await me 'round the next bend. That might be one of the secrets to aging gracefully. Maybe not. Then again, maybe.

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Nearby Results Your search returned 52 nearby results

  1. Priscilla Uychich DO

    Elmwood Park, NJ (About 3 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 796-0866

  2. Robin Leder MD

    Hackensack, NJ (About 3 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 525-1155

  3. Joseph Carluccio MD

    Bloomfield, NJ (About 5 miles)

    Phone
    (973) 338-3300

  4. Aurora DeJuliis MD

    Bloomfield, NJ (About 5 miles)

    Phone
    (973) 338-6300

  5. Lonnie Morris ND, CNM

    Fort Lee, NJ (About 5 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 969-1759

  6. Neil Share MD

    Fair Lawn, NJ (About 5 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 796-2025

  7. Karen Patrusky MD

    Englewood, NJ (About 5 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 871-4346

  8. Gary Klingsberg DO

    Englewood, NJ (About 6 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 503-0007

  9. Ellen Blye MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 877-2833

  10. Erika Schwartz MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (866) 373-7452

  11. Larry Neuman MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 568-7403

  12. Mahshid Assadi MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 315-3322

  13. Jacque Moritz MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 603-4160

  14. Thomas Tupper MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 246-5888

  15. John Paciuc MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 737-3356

  16. Shari Leipzig MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 860-2600

  17. Gila Leiter MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 860-2600

  18. Douglas Moss MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 860-2600

  19. Sophia Drosinos MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 317-4541

  20. Michael Aziz MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 906-9111

  21. Ronald Hoffman MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 779-1744

  22. James Cowan MD

    Ridgewood, NJ (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 670-4124

  23. Richard Rivlin MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 898-2749

  24. Eric Braverman MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 213-6155

  25. Jeffrey Delson MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 206-0629

  26. Carol Skipper MD

    Jersey City, NJ (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 547-3555

  27. Sabina Ostolski DO

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 253-5501

  28. Nancy Mellow MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 242-0430

  29. Deborah Coady MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 941-0011

  30. Eden Fromberg DO

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 941-0011

  31. Anne Cozien-Crenesse MD

    Brooklyn, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 780-4851

  32. Virginia Reath PA

    New York, NY (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 219-3440

  33. Gary Goldman MD

    New York, NY (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 535-6100

  34. Eric Wahl MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 674-8777

  35. Monique Vizel-Schwartz MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 228-7645

  36. Adrienne Simone MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 627-1222

  37. Roberta Lee MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 935-2220

  38. Karen Paris PA

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 779-2944

  39. Fred Pescatore MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 779-2944

  40. Eric Ganz MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 641-4500

  41. Steven Goldstein MD

    New York, NY (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 263-7416

  42. Richard Ash MD

    New York, NY (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 758-3200

  43. Karlene ChinQuee MD

    New York, NY (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 861-3130

  44. Claudia Cooke MD

    New York, NY (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 213-0288

  45. Eileen Hoffman MD

    New York, NY (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 424-1530

  46. Melinda Huang MD

    New York, NY (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 423-3430

  47. Kathryn Shreve NP

    New York, NY (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 423-3430

  48. Janis Enzenbacher MD

    Piermont, NY (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (845) 680-6600

  49. Alan Jacobs MD

    New York, NY (About 16 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 888-0002

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