Anti-Aging in North Arlington, New Jersey

Menopause and Giving in to the Mystery

By Menopause Goddess, Lynette Sheppard

Early in my Menopause transition (euphemism for hellish maelstrom of horrifying hormonal events), so many things bothered me that I couldn't keep count. As the preliminary WTF freakouts of perimenopause and volcanic upheavals of The Big M are now mostly in my rear view mirror, I realize that some irritants that used to upset me simply don’t any longer. And that’s a real blessing.

For example, I used to be confounded and annoyed by the backhanded compliment "You look good…for your age." Now, heck, I'll take any compliment I can get without overanalyzing it for nuance or even honesty. I'll just focus on the "look good" part and thank the complimenter with sincere gratitude.

Being called ma'am initially was both disconcerting and horrifying. My mom is ma'am. And she just barely. I felt old and frumpy every time I was addressed in this fashion usually by someone only recently out of diapers, waiting on me in the store or bank.

But now, I gotta say, I'm okay with ma’am. You might say I've grown into it. Ma'am. Short for madam – now there’s a racy little thought. And when someone calls me "Miss"? I know they're just sucking up or trying to sell me something. I no way qualify for "Miss" anymore. Another thing in my rear view mirror and I don’t really miss it.

I've heard some of my friends and sister goddesses over the years complain about being invisible. And I've certainly experienced that evanescence myself when a clerk looks right past me to wait on some hot young woman. "Hey!" I'd want to yell. "I"m right here taking up space. Service me – or at least wait on me." (No I never did yell, I'd just clear my throat and say, "Excuse me, I believe I was here first." Which either worked or didn't.

However, now in my post menopausal incarnation, I find that I enjoy a certain anonymity, thanks to this decreasing visibility. I can slip in and out of places faster than a greased pig. Hawkers on the street miss giving me flyers. I love that.

And if I'm having a bad hair day? Or a fat day? Who cares? I'm invisible in the very best way and can just go about my business, carefree and happy. I don't have an image to keep up. I'm ma'am now, remember?

No, I'm not letting myself go – just letting myself be. So much easier when you aren't noticed that much anymore. Whew, what a relief. Forgetting things drove me absolutely stark staring mad in the beginning of my transition. Not so anymore. I'm used to it. I have workarounds to make my life work. I am the Queen of ritual and OCD in organizing stuff.

I just can't trust my formerly prodigious memory any longer to pick up the slack. And honestly, I can't get all worked up about it anymore. I exercise my brain as well as my body but neither are going to be in Olympic condition any time soon. Or ever. Hence the workarounds.

Lastly, not knowing the why of things sent me into an info gathering tailspin. Not all bad. I've learned (and shared) so much about the crazy Menopause journey through my incessant desire for understanding. And while I can learn and understand a lot, some things will remain incomprehensible. Maybe forever.

Like why I had hot flashes to the point of nausea and my friend Susan had nary a flush. Or why black cohosh works for some and not others. Or why I and others lose our hair while some women boast luxurious manes all their lives.

Overall, I've come to an acceptance that some things may never be clear. In a sense, I’m on a need-to-know basis – and apparently the great mystery has decided that I don’t really need to know. So be it.

Maybe the biggest change is this: I'm just going to enjoy the Mystery, however it plays out, whatever challenges or wonders await me 'round the next bend. That might be one of the secrets to aging gracefully. Maybe not. Then again, maybe.

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Nearby Results Your search returned 60 nearby results

  1. Joseph Carluccio MD

    Bloomfield, NJ (About 4 miles)

    Phone
    (973) 338-3300

  2. Aurora DeJuliis MD

    Bloomfield, NJ (About 4 miles)

    Phone
    (973) 338-6300

  3. Carol Skipper MD

    Jersey City, NJ (About 6 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 547-3555

  4. Priscilla Uychich DO

    Elmwood Park, NJ (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 796-0866

  5. Thomas Tupper MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 246-5888

  6. Jeffrey Delson MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 206-0629

  7. Jacque Moritz MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 603-4160

  8. Ronald Hoffman MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 779-1744

  9. Mahshid Assadi MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 315-3322

  10. Deborah Coady MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 941-0011

  11. Eden Fromberg DO

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 941-0011

  12. Nancy Mellow MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 242-0430

  13. Erika Schwartz MD

    New York, NY (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (866) 373-7452

  14. Sabina Ostolski DO

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 253-5501

  15. Eric Braverman MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 213-6155

  16. Ellen Blye MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 877-2833

  17. Robin Leder MD

    Hackensack, NJ (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 525-1155

  18. Lonnie Morris ND, CNM

    Fort Lee, NJ (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 969-1759

  19. Michael Aziz MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 906-9111

  20. Sophia Drosinos MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 317-4541

  21. John Paciuc MD

    New York, NY (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 737-3356

  22. Richard Rivlin MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 898-2749

  23. Shari Leipzig MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 860-2600

  24. Gila Leiter MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 860-2600

  25. Douglas Moss MD

    New York, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 860-2600

  26. Rimma Sherman MD

    Livingston, NJ (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (973) 597-1197

  27. Anne Cozien-Crenesse MD

    Brooklyn, NY (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 780-4851

  28. Karen Patrusky MD

    Englewood, NJ (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 871-4346

  29. Neil Share MD

    Fair Lawn, NJ (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 796-2025

  30. Monique Vizel-Schwartz MD

    New York, NY (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 228-7645

  31. Larry Neuman MD

    New York, NY (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 568-7403

  32. Eric Wahl MD

    New York, NY (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 674-8777

  33. Steven Goldstein MD

    New York, NY (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 263-7416

  34. Roberta Lee MD

    New York, NY (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 935-2220

  35. Gary Klingsberg DO

    Englewood, NJ (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 503-0007

  36. Adrienne Simone MD

    New York, NY (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 627-1222

  37. Daniel Zacharias MD

    Short Hills, NJ (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (973) 912-0006

  38. Virginia Reath PA

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 219-3440

  39. Gary Goldman MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 535-6100

  40. Richard Ash MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 758-3200

  41. Karlene ChinQuee MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 861-3130

  42. Tina Dobsevage MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 672-0763

  43. Elizabeth Poynor MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 426-2700

  44. Eric Ganz MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 641-4500

  45. Karen Paris PA

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 779-2944

  46. Fred Pescatore MD

    New York, NY (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 779-2944

  47. Janet E Norton MD

    Staten Island, NY (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 727-9125

  48. Anna Pavlides MD

    Staten Island, NY (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 273-5500

  49. Rita Shats MD

    Staten Island, NY (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 273-5500

  50. Eric Knochenhauer MD

    Staten Island, NY (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 761-6000

  51. Claudia Cooke MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (212) 213-0288

  52. Eileen Hoffman MD

    New York, NY (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (646) 424-1530

  53. James Cowan MD

    Ridgewood, NJ (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (201) 670-4124

  54. John Reynolds PA

    Pompton Plns, NJ (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (845) 364-9496

  55. Nurten Rasid MD

    Brooklyn, NY (About 15 miles)

    Phone
    (800) 419-2804

  56. Pavel Yutsis MD

    Brooklyn, NY (About 16 miles)

    Phone
    (718) 368-9555

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