Anti-Aging in Malibu, California

Menopause and Giving in to the Mystery

By Menopause Goddess, Lynette Sheppard

Early in my Menopause transition (euphemism for hellish maelstrom of horrifying hormonal events), so many things bothered me that I couldn't keep count. As the preliminary WTF freakouts of perimenopause and volcanic upheavals of The Big M are now mostly in my rear view mirror, I realize that some irritants that used to upset me simply don’t any longer. And that’s a real blessing.

For example, I used to be confounded and annoyed by the backhanded compliment "You look good…for your age." Now, heck, I'll take any compliment I can get without overanalyzing it for nuance or even honesty. I'll just focus on the "look good" part and thank the complimenter with sincere gratitude.

Being called ma'am initially was both disconcerting and horrifying. My mom is ma'am. And she just barely. I felt old and frumpy every time I was addressed in this fashion usually by someone only recently out of diapers, waiting on me in the store or bank.

But now, I gotta say, I'm okay with ma’am. You might say I've grown into it. Ma'am. Short for madam – now there’s a racy little thought. And when someone calls me "Miss"? I know they're just sucking up or trying to sell me something. I no way qualify for "Miss" anymore. Another thing in my rear view mirror and I don’t really miss it.

I've heard some of my friends and sister goddesses over the years complain about being invisible. And I've certainly experienced that evanescence myself when a clerk looks right past me to wait on some hot young woman. "Hey!" I'd want to yell. "I"m right here taking up space. Service me – or at least wait on me." (No I never did yell, I'd just clear my throat and say, "Excuse me, I believe I was here first." Which either worked or didn't.

However, now in my post menopausal incarnation, I find that I enjoy a certain anonymity, thanks to this decreasing visibility. I can slip in and out of places faster than a greased pig. Hawkers on the street miss giving me flyers. I love that.

And if I'm having a bad hair day? Or a fat day? Who cares? I'm invisible in the very best way and can just go about my business, carefree and happy. I don't have an image to keep up. I'm ma'am now, remember?

No, I'm not letting myself go – just letting myself be. So much easier when you aren't noticed that much anymore. Whew, what a relief. Forgetting things drove me absolutely stark staring mad in the beginning of my transition. Not so anymore. I'm used to it. I have workarounds to make my life work. I am the Queen of ritual and OCD in organizing stuff.

I just can't trust my formerly prodigious memory any longer to pick up the slack. And honestly, I can't get all worked up about it anymore. I exercise my brain as well as my body but neither are going to be in Olympic condition any time soon. Or ever. Hence the workarounds.

Lastly, not knowing the why of things sent me into an info gathering tailspin. Not all bad. I've learned (and shared) so much about the crazy Menopause journey through my incessant desire for understanding. And while I can learn and understand a lot, some things will remain incomprehensible. Maybe forever.

Like why I had hot flashes to the point of nausea and my friend Susan had nary a flush. Or why black cohosh works for some and not others. Or why I and others lose our hair while some women boast luxurious manes all their lives.

Overall, I've come to an acceptance that some things may never be clear. In a sense, I’m on a need-to-know basis – and apparently the great mystery has decided that I don’t really need to know. So be it.

Maybe the biggest change is this: I'm just going to enjoy the Mystery, however it plays out, whatever challenges or wonders await me 'round the next bend. That might be one of the secrets to aging gracefully. Maybe not. Then again, maybe.

We know how important finding the right provider and hormone health care is for you.

Our Health Provider Locator contains many types of professionals, please refer to the following list for explanation:

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Local Results Your search returned 1 local result

  1. David Baron MD

    Malibu, CA

    Phone
    (310) 456-6505

Nearby Results Your search returned 40 nearby results

  1. Nina Levy MD

    Agoura Hills, CA (About 7 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 879-7979

  2. Giselle Namazie MD

    Agoura, CA (About 8 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 889-1636

  3. Linda Abrams NP

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  4. Maria Amado MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  5. Luz DelPortillo MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  6. Ani Ketabjian MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  7. Richard Lander MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  8. Gerald Michaelson MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  9. Maria Michnowska MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  10. Kathryn Moyer MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  11. Janice Spinner MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 876-1050

  12. Gayle Randall MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 591-7600

  13. Christine Farrell FNP, FNPC

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 865-8500

  14. Stephanie Mandelman MD

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 496-0880

  15. Edward Portnoy MD

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 9 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 497-9272

  16. Lori Musto DO

    Pacific Plsds, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (310) 454-1212

  17. Angela Agrios ND

    Pacific Plsds, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (310) 459-2942

  18. Anil Daya MD

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 446-4444

  19. Edward Hanzelik MD

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 446-4444

  20. John Horton MD

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 446-4444

  21. Pratibha Kumar MD

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 446-4444

  22. Melissa Metcalfe ND

    Westlake Vlg, CA (About 10 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 374-7363

  23. Phillip Taylor MD

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 497-3839

  24. Allan Kurtz DO

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 346-1440

  25. Ian Taras MD

    Woodland Hls, CA (About 11 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 887-0050

  26. Vikram Singh MD

    West Hills, CA (About 12 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 884-5480

  27. Louise Garcia MD

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 777-7009

  28. Patricia Glick NP

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 371-4700

  29. Karie McMurray MD

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 371-4700

  30. Daryl Alexander MD

    Tarzana, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 776-0200

  31. Arieh Bergman MD

    Tarzana, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 881-8999

  32. Shelley Susman MD

    Tarzana, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 757-2222

  33. Ilona Abraham MD

    Encino, CA (About 13 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 345-8721

  34. Erik Nielsen OMD, LAC

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 492-1811

  35. Jane Lindberg MD

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 497-4545

  36. Tana Richter PAC

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 497-4545

  37. Joel Popson MD

    Newbury Park, CA (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 324-9897

  38. Steven Tenenbaum MD

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 214-9990

  39. Steven Tenenbaum MD

    Thousand Oaks, CA (About 14 miles)

    Phone
    (805) 214-9990

  40. Green Hsueh MD

    Northridge, CA (About 16 miles)

    Phone
    (818) 701-0176

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